Thank You For Your Patience
I am such a procrastinator of the worst kind... I admit it........
On the other hand I am working on a new blog, I will be open for b...
5 years ago
Friday, September 17, 2010
Picking Up The Pieces
Where do you start ? Where do you go ? What do you do ? How do you even begin living again and take that first step into the land of the living.
It seems so strange to me to be alone
When I was young I had my mother and father and my 3 brothers with me just about 24 hours a day.Plus my father's huge family always around the corner .
Then later in my life I got married left my parents home to enter my own home with my brand spanking new husband which I just adored, he lived for me and I for him. Our favorite song was by the Turtles called So Happy Together and it was so appropriate
Forward now 39 years later here I am alone, its not fair to say that in a way, some of you know that my mother in law lives with me but she has alzheimers,and in a matter of speaking I am alone I am in the process of trying to place her in a nursing home.
John and I did the caregiving together and it worked she has lived with us 10 years,but now I am alone for her care........... its just too much for me. Guilt trip ........ oh yes very much so. But it is still just too much for me alone. Its eating away at me bit by bit.
What I want to do is take a few classes in the art of painting, water color, oil and acrylic that would be my heaven right now.My soul needs soothing and throwing myself into something creative would be bliss . Can I take those classes right now ? No........ I can't leave her that long......... But I can dabble on my own and I will at least I can do that for myself
IS life fair ...........NO its not fair but I must go on and pick up the pieces and keep on living.