A Bushel And A Half Of Roma Tomatoes !

My son came to see me from Ottawa this weekend and brought me a bushel and a half of roma tomatoes, they were beautiful, its the last thing he bought for me from a farmers market near my daughters house.
They were gorgeous heavy things , smelling of sunshine and earth
I decided to can them for use over the winter .
This is how I did it.

First I got a huge pot of boiling water going and I dropped some tomatoes in until the skin blisters a bit, I score the blossom end first as well.
You do this in batches.
Then I put on latex gloves for the next part.
You peel the skin off the tomato then squish them one by one between my fingers until they are mushed up well.I don't leave any large bits.
You could use your processor but that makes it too mushy for my taste.
I didn't add anything not even pepper because I don't know what I will use those tomatoes for , could be in any number of things from soup to chili to pasta sauce or what ever....
*You will notice my use of proper culinary words !

Then in the oven it goes for hours on end until your happy with it ,I waited until it was reduced to half in consistency.
When your sauce is nearly ready prepare your jars by washing them in the hottest water you have and I pour in each jar boiling water to sterilize them , also do the lids the same way.
Then in each jar I added a few tablespoons of real lemon juice and half a teaspoon of salt.


Then the jars go into a hot water bath for 15 minutes.Dont forget to put a towel on the bottom so the jars dont bump into each other and shatter.


This is the result of half the tomatoes I had , today I will do a repeat performance with the other half.
The house smelled wonderful when I was done.
Felt like a real accomplishment.
I think its tomato soup for supper with a slice of toasted crusty bread.

Picking Up The Pieces

Where do you start ?
Where do you go ?
What do you do ?
How do you even begin living again and take that first step into the land of the living.

It seems so strange to me to be alone

When I was young I had my mother and father and my 3 brothers with me just about 24 hours a day.Plus my father's huge family always around the corner .

Then later in my life I got married left my parents home to enter my own home with my brand spanking new husband which I just adored, he lived for me and I for him.
Our favorite song was by the Turtles called So Happy Together and it was so appropriate

Forward now 39 years later here I am alone, its not fair to say that in a way, some of you know that my mother in law lives with me but she has alzheimers,and in a matter of speaking I am alone I am in the process of trying to place her in a nursing home.

John and I did the caregiving together and it worked she has lived with us 10 years,but now I am alone for her care........... its just too much for me.
Guilt trip ........ oh yes very much so. But it is still just too much for me alone.
Its eating away at me bit by bit.

What I want to do is take a few classes in the art of painting, water color, oil and acrylic that would be my heaven right now.My soul needs soothing and throwing myself into something creative would be bliss .
Can I take those classes right now ? No........ I can't leave her that long.........
But I can dabble on my own and I will at least I can do that for myself

IS life fair ...........NO its not fair but I must go on and pick up the pieces and keep on living.

One Month Today

How can I ever forget that day........... I never will
It is the most tragic and saddest day of my life.
I can't even put how I feel into words ,are none to describe how I feel
My John is gone for ever, eternity is a very long time ,its past forever by a long long time
I am too young to be a widow...........what an awful word
I always thought it was for old women but here I am a widow of one month
My life as I knew it will never be the same again
I know my children love me beyond words and I feel firm in their love for me
I also know they are there for me, for anything at anytime
But I feel so alone, like a little leaf........ shivering in the wind
My rock, my protector is gone, torn from ,he was too young to die
Never again I will see the look in his eyes of soft tender love
No more sweet kisses no more long hugs, no more I love you
Just tender memories of our love together
Can that sustain me forever into eternity
Yes
I have known him 45 years and married for 39 of them

How much do I Love Him and how much do I Miss Him
No words needed to describe how I feel

Thank You

I want to thank everyone who sent me kind words of condolences.
Worst week of my life.
The family is hurting ,we are just numb.
I will miss my John,I can't believe I will have the rest of my life without him,it dosen't seem possible, his presence and spirit was huge in our home and in our lives.
I know he is watching over us now but I would rather he was here with me.
Rest in peace my love.

Sadness and Memories

I wont be on for a while, my husband of 39 years passed away on Tuesday
Funeral is Saturday
Please ladies keep me in your prayers, I have many mountains to climb and my heart is broken because half of my heart has just passed away.
Some of you have my personal email feel free to contact me that way.
Diane

I Am Ready !!

Tomorrow I am leaving for a few days !
I am going to Ottawa to visit my daughter !!
See you in about a week.

My New Old Friend !!!

When I was 5 years old I had a childhood best friend her name was Jaqueline, they lived just a few houses away from ours .
That little girl and I had so much fun, we had tea parties and we played skipping rope and played ball, went for bike rides, her mother made pigs in a blanket for snacks.
Her family came from England, they lived in Canada for a few years then they moved back to England I never saw her again.
Being so young I missed my friend but life went on for me ... like school and other friends ..later in life getting married and having my own children.
But I never forgot her and always wondered about my little friend Jaqueline,where was she now? was she married? did she have children?where did she work?who her friends were? was she happy?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Then the miracle of Facebook !!!
Just for fun I decided to type in her name, low and behold there were a few women with her name,I wrote a short note to them asking if they ever lived in my town and explained who I was.
A week later I got a note from Jackie my new old friend Jaqueline !!!!!!!
She totally remembered me !!
She wondered about me all these years as well !!!
She told her daughter stories about our childhood together in Canada.
Out of the 60 odd million people who live in the UK I actually found my friend !!
I am so happy I can hardly stand it ! She on her end is estatic as well.
No we are learning about each other all over again.
Life is grand !

Freda and Deuce

This is my daughter's classy lady cat Freda ,isin't she a beauty !!
She has the sweetest disposition,and loves to play ,she is 4 and still has a lot of kitten in her personality.
She fetches balls if your willing to play with her !!

And she is polydactyle.... that means way too many toes... LOL !

She can take her own treat out of the bag and put it in her mouth.....too funny to watch !

I just love her to bits !!!



This is the handsome new man in my daughter's life, this is Deuce !!
He was a guest of the Humane Society and my daughter just fell head over heels in love with this lovable creature. He is so affectionate, he wants to cuddle and just loves attention.
He loves ribbon and string... he is 4 years old too, and just a delightful little guy!
In a few weeks I will go to Ottawa and get to meet and play with him.... can't wait .....
I will go armed with treats and toys !!!

I wanted you all to meet my two little sweethearts !!

Thrift Store Find !

Last week when my daughter came up to visit, we made time to go visit a few thrift stores, it was actually my daughter who spotted this blue beauty !
Its an enamel cast iron dutch oven in the most gorgeous cobalt blue color and best of all it was only $30.00 !!!
And it was brand new perfect condition !
Such a lucky find ~!
Today was the day to try it out, I made a beef stew and it was sooooo darn good, better than usual I must say!
I did all my usual steps in preparation then put it in my oven at 350% after an hour I lowered it to 250% and left to go for a country ride and a coffee after wards with my hubby and my mother in law...( yes it tough being retired).
When we got home ohhh the smell in the house.....I steamed some green beans to add and voila dinner was served.Its been so hot these days we eat light so it was nice to have a hot meal... I love salad and broiled salmon , once in a while a nice hot meal is good too !
So I have to say I love this thing!!
I will make chili in it and pasta sauce and all manners of delish things...
Do you have a good recipe for a dutch oven I am a newby to this method of cooking.
Worth every darn penny ... hehehe.. . I know they are worth a small fortune too...
PS .... 28 pounds by the way !! ( Can't believe it myself)

Celebration !!!!!

Today I stepped on the scale...... it dosen't scare me so much anymore..... LOL !!!!

As of today I lost ~~~~~~~~~~~25 pounds !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so happy and proud of myself !

Its not easy losing weight at my age, I think its my last kick at the weight loss can.Its not easy as you get older,I don't know why...

I don't want to live in a fat body anymore,I was too comfortable in my skin for too long.
About a month and a half ago the good doctor put me on diabetic meds, I was so angry and disappointed at myself for letting it get this far .

I decided right then and there to make a life long commitment to myself,all my life I took care of everyone else, first my brothers when I lived at home, then I got married and took care of my husband and then my 2 beautiful children as they were growing up they are my heart, my father was ill for years and years before he died , even my job got more attention than I gave myself.
I always put my needs last ...............I did this all my life

Were both retired now but not empty nesters, some of you know my MIL lives with us,she has alzheimers , most days she is calm and all is good but some days are hell.It takes a lot of energy and mental ability to deal with all that.( Trust me it makes me tired beyond words )

I have a really bad knee needing replacement that will happen in the next year hopefully, then I want a cruise to Europe when I have recovered enough to do some serious walking.

I want to do all that in a slimmer body ! I don't feel the need to weigh 100 pounds I need to be realistic about my goal,and my first 25 pounds to me is like a huge stepping stone towards my goal.
One step... one day at a time looking after myself !!

The Trauma of Getting a New Bathing Suit !!!

This week my daughter and my son came to visit us.I love it when we can be all together !
It was a busy fast pace week.

We hung out together, we did BBQ's , they visited friends and we went shopping (of course), we did all sorts of things we would normally do together
.
I happen to mention that I would really enjoy going back to aqua fit classes like I use to.It feels so good to exercise in water,no pain in those stiff knees of mine.I use to go twice a week and somehow I got away from going.

BUT I needed a bathing suit and my favorite shop had them for half price this week..... well it was time to go and have a look see right!

OMG !!!

I only tried on 3, a two piece and the other 2 were one piece......
Here I am so proud of myself having lost 22 pounds , feeling better and svelter(is that a word?)

You realize really quickly that its a drop in the proverbial bucket..... I need to lose another 22 pounds....(I am working on it.... remember... the no carbs post...... I have the willpower to keep on.... its not easy but I am doing it)

Looking at oneself in a small room with a full length mirrors on each wall is humbling..... You see the thighs in all their glory.... you see your back....... and you see your behind..... I didn't know my trunk had so much junk..........

Parts of you that use to be North have moved South....
Which one to chose ?? so difficult...... no choice you must try on several to make up your mind, to find the right one that slenderizes and hides the most of your abundant womanly parts.... hehe...I know you know what I am talking about ... don't pretend you don't now...




I use to be 110 pounds soaking wet with a brick in my pocket like these ladies above but that my friends was a long long time ago.... pre baby days ago !
You know what I mean..... I know you do.......



Wish I could wear one that hid everything like this one..... but I would get laughed at... heck I would laugh too.... I love the bloomers... you know that reminds me I still have my old high school gym suit, it was red and had bloomers it was a one piece.. yup... was a size 6..... ohhhhh those days are soooo behind me...



Well I wanted to jump for joy when I found a half way decent one for my over abundant shape.
My daughter says it looks just fine, to me it looks a bit dated but it did hide the thunder thighs and that makes me happy.
It looks very much like this one ,same style !
Have you had a bathing suit reality check latetly??? Scary isin't it !!!!

I lost something.... I hope it stays lost forever !

I lost >>>> 20<<<<<< pounds !!!!!!!!!!!!!
No bread, no rice , no potato, no pasta, no cake, no pie ,no cookies, nothing with carbs.
Just lots of veggies, a little fruit and protein. NO CARBS !
Its not easy ladies I am an admitted carbo junky, but I had to put a stop to it so I went cold turkey !
And as crasy as it sounds I am not hungry anymore..... I can hardly believe it myself.
When I was a carb junky I was ALWAYS hungry and I am not kidding, I did control what I eat but I was still always hungry.
Not anymore !!!!!!!! Its a miracle I tell you !!!!
Anyway I wanted to share my good news and I hope to never ever see those 20 pounds ever again....... I feel so much better !!!!!!!
YEAH ME !!!!!!!

Hot Hot Hot !!

Phew its hot !!!
For me its all about a lemonade with lots of lemon !
Or ........
A nice tall glass of ice water !
And the air conditioner of course !
Can't eat a full meal , its light salad for us.....its just too hot for a lot of food !
Today was like breathing through a wet woolen blanket outside..... yuk humid and hot !!
What's it like at your end of the world?

The Queen !

On Canada Day July First the Queen was in Ottawa
My daughter was in the crowd at Parliment Hill waiting for Her majesty and was not disapointed !!

I told my daughter this was a once in a lifetime opportunity !
She got such marvelous photos I just had to share !

This is the Eternal Flame in Ottawa



Today is July 4th Independence Day for my American friends I want to wish you all a Happy 4th ,I hope you get together with your families and have a fun day.
Diane

Alzheimer's

Alzheimer's is not for sissy's ,it rob's you of your life, your very essence leaves your body,and you must rely on family to take care of you for every day living needs.

It also rob's the family of a normal life as well, everything you do revolves around the person with alzheimer's,you must take every single moment of their day in consideration before your own.Its not always pleasant or welcomed.

The parent becomes your child.And it breaks your heart, it makes you mad and it makes you sad.
There is no cure and no recovery from alzheimer's.

Imagine for a moment living your life in a fog, not remembering names, faces, events, your past, just short fast glimpse of things and people you remember.

It would be like the picture below in your mind every day for the rest of your life.

	Alzheimer's disease is a progressive, degenerative disease. Symptoms include loss of memory, difficulty with day-to-day tasks, and changes in mood and behaviour. People may think these symptoms are part of normal aging but they aren't. It is important to see a doctor when you notice any of these symptoms as they may be due to other conditions such as depression, drug interactions or an infection. If the diagnosis is Alzheimer's disease, your local Alzheimer Society can help. To help you know what warning signs to look for, the Alzheimer Society has developed the following list: Memory loss that affects day-to-day function It's normal to occasionally forget appointments, colleagues' names or a friend's phone number and remember them later. A person with Alzheimer's disease may forget things more often and not remember them later, especially things that have happened more recently. Difficulty performing familiar tasks Busy people can be so distracted from time to time that they may leave the carrots on the stove and only remember to serve them at the end of a meal. A person with Alzheimer's disease may have trouble with tasks that have been familiar to them all their lives, such as preparing a meal. Problems with language Everyone has trouble finding the right word sometimes, but a person with Alzheimer's disease may forget simple words or substitute words, making her sentences difficult to understand. Disorientation of time and place It's normal to forget the day of the week or your destination -- for a moment. But a person with Alzheimer's disease can become lost on their own street, not knowing how they got there or how to get home. Poor or decreased judgment People may sometimes put off going to a doctor if they have an infection, but eventually seek medical attention. A person with Alzheimer's disease may have decreased judgment, for example not recognizing a medical problem that needs attention or wearing heavy clothing on a hot day. Problems with abstract thinking From time to time, people may have difficulty with tasks that require abstract thinking, such as balancing a cheque book. Someone with Alzheimer's disease may have significant difficulties with such tasks, for example not recognizing what the numbers in the cheque book mean. Misplacing things Anyone can temporarily misplace a wallet or keys. A person with Alzheimer's disease may put things in inappropriate places: an iron in the freezer or a wristwatch in the sugar bowl. Changes in mood and behaviour Everyone becomes sad or moody from time to time. Someone with Alzheimer's disease can exhibit varied mood swings -- from calm to tears to anger -- for no apparent reason. Changes in personality People's personalities can change somewhat with age. But a person with Alzheimer's disease can become confused, suspicious or withdrawn. Changes may also include apathy, fearfulness or acting out of character. Loss of initiative It's normal to tire of housework, business activities or social obligations, but most people regain their initiative. A person with Alzheimer's disease may become very passive, and require cues and prompting to become involved.

Family Issues

Were going through some family issues right now,I have a lot going on .....
I will be back soon.
Diane

African Violets in A Basket

My mother gave me the basket years ago , this is how it looks today I just wanted to show you how pretty it is.The violets are all in bloom at the same time.Except for one in the back, I turned it to face the sun ( its diffused light)so it would remember to do what its suppose to do and flower like the others..
African Violets are so easy to grow for me ,I water when they are dry not before and dont put any water on the leaves or else the leaves rot and fall off and basically ignore them , they don't like to be touched so just look with your eyes not with your hands...

This is the other one I have ,it bloomed at the same time,its also facing the sun in diffused light.
My son had an African Violet plant my mother gave him when he was in university years ago that thing grew into giant proportions and had flowers all the time.....being a young busy man my advice to ignore worked for him ...LOL!!!